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My house was at the Phoenix? Wast thou mad,
Dro. S. What answer, sir? when spake I such a
Ant. S. Even now, even here, not half an hour since.
Dro. S. I did not see you since you sent me hence,
Home to the Centaur, with the gold you gave me. Ant. S. Villain, thou didst deny the gold's receipt;
And told'st me of a mistress, and a dinner;
Think'st thou, I jest? Hold, take thou that, and [Beating him. Dro. S. Hold, sir, for God's sake: now your jest
Upon what bargain do you give it me?
Ant. S. Because that I familiarly sometimes Do use you for my fool, and chat with you, Your sauciness will jest upon my love,
And make a common of my serious hours.
When the sun shines, let foolish gnats make sport,
Dro. S. Sconce, call you it? so you would leave battering, I had rather have it a head: an you use
6 And make a common of my serious hours.] i. e. intrude on them when you please. The allusion is to those tracts of ground destined to common use, which are thence called commons.
know my aspect,]i. e. study my countenance.
these blows long, I must get a sconce for my head, and insconce it too; or else I shall seek my wit in my shoulders. But, I pray, sir, why am I beaten? Ant. S. Dost thou not know?
Dro. S. Nothing, sir; but that I am beaten.
Dro. S. Ay, sir, and wherefore; for, they say, every why hath a wherefore.
Ant. Why, first,-for flouting me; and then, wherefore,
For urging it the second time to me.
Dro. S. Was there ever any man thus beaten out of season?
When, in the why, and the wherefore, is neither rhyme nor reason?
Well, sir, I thank you.
Ant. S. Thank me, sir? for what?
Dro. S. Marry, sir, for this something that you gave me for nothing.
Ant. I'll make you amends next, to give you nothing for something. But, say, sir, is it dinnertime?
Dro. S. No, sir; I think, the meat wants that I have.
Ant. S. In good time, sir, what's that?
Dro. S. Basting.
Ant. S. Well, sir, then 'twill be dry.
Dro. S. If it be, sir, I pray you eat none of it.
Dro. S. Lest it make you cholerick, and purchase me another dry basting.
Ant. S. Well, sir, learn to jest in good time; There's a time for all things.
Dro. S. I durst have denied that, before you were so cholerick.
and inscce it too;] A sconce was a petty fortification.
Ant. S. By what rule, sir?
Dro. S. Marry, sir, by a rule as plain as the plain: bald pate of father Time himself.
Ant. S. Let's hear it.
Dro. S. There's no time for a man to recover his hair, that grows bald by nature.
Ant. S. May he not do it by fine and recovery?9
Dro. S. Yes, to pay a fine for a peruke, and recover the lost hair of another man.
Ant. S. Why is Time such a niggard of hair, being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement?
Dro. S. Because it is a blessing that he bestows on beasts: and what he hath scanted men in hair, he hath given them in wit.
Ant. S. Why, but there's many a man hath more hair than wit.
Dro. S. Not a man of those, but he hath the wit to lose his hair.
Ant. S. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men plain dealers without wit.
Dro. S. The plainer dealer, the sooner lost: Yet he loseth it in a kind of jollity.
Ant. S. For what reason?
Dro. S. For two; and sound ones too.
Dro. S. Sure ones then.
Ant. S. Nay, not sure, in a thing falsing.'
Dro. S. Certain ones then.
Ant. S. Name them.
Dro. S. The one, to save the money that he
by fine and recovery?] This attempt at pleasantry must have originated from our author's clerkship to an attorney. He has other jokes of the same school. STEEVENS.
falsing.] This word is now obsolete. Spenser and Chaucer often use the verb to false. Mr. Heath would read falling. STEEVENS.
spends in tiring; the other, that at dinner they should not drop in his porridge.packa
Ant. S. You would all this time have proved, there is no time for all things. an es
Dro. S. Marry, and did, sir; namely, no time to recover hair lost by nature.
Ant. S. But your reason was not substantial, why there is no time to recover.
Dro. S. Thus I mend it: Time himself is bald, and therefore, to the world's end, will have bald followers.
Ant. S. I knew, 'twould be a bald conclusion: But soft! who wafts us2 yonder?
Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA.
Adr. Ay, ay, Antipholus, look strange, and frown;
Some other mistress hath thy sweet aspects,
The time was once, when thou unurg d would'st vow
That never object pleasing in thine eye,
wafts us] i. e. beckons us.
may'st thou fall —] To fall is here a verb active.
Without addition, or diminishing,
As take from me thyself, and not me too.
I know thou canst; and therefore, see, thou do it.
My blood is mingled with the crime of lust:
Keep then fair league and truce with thy true bed;
Ant. S. Plead you to me, fair dame? I know
In Ephesus I am but two hours old,
As strange unto your town, as to your talk ;
Luc. Fye, brother! how the world is chang'd with you:
When were you wont to use my sister thus?
Ant. S. By Dromio?
Dro. S. By me?
Adr. By thee; and this thou didst return from
That he did buffet thee, and, in his blows
Denied my house for his, me for his wife.
Ant. S. Did you converse, sir, with this gentlewoman?